Translated by Phoebe Bay Carter. There is no denying that the tale I am telling you shares a certain resemblance with the story it inspired, the one written by Franz Kafka over a century ago. That said, it is most certainly not an exact copy. But, like that story, I will pause here for a moment to recount a bit of our hero’s backstory before returning to the morning of the metamorphosis, what happened after that, and perhaps how it all came about.
Knowing only English, I am astounded by the thought process in translating the author’s meaning of a simple phrase. I feel you have captured it .Good work Phoebe!
Yes, these phrases are always so tricky! I love your explanation of the challenges inherent in translating them and your thoughtful approach to this particular case. I also really enjoy seeing the various solutions you came up with. Your reasoning for your final choice is persuasive. I like the idea of alluding to "Allahu Akbar" rather than making it explicit. As you said, that phrase in English is too closely associated with the extremist battle cry, perhaps to the point of being reduced to that meaning alone for many readers. Changing "shouts" to "cries" is an artful move. It simultaneously compensates for omitting the specific "Allahu Akbar" 'cry' while adding a layer of meaning - cries of emotion - the visceral response to what the bargoers are witnessing on TV that leads to their utterances. I like it!
Another thought on this came to me while I was “sleeping”. How about using ‘Almighty God’ somehow? “Cries to God Almighty…”. Or “Cries invoking the Almighty…”? Just a thought…
Jan 13, 2022·edited Jan 13, 2022Liked by Mohammed Said Hjiouij
This is a really great process! Thanks for sharing like this. I wonder if takbeerat could be translated as hosannas? Usually associated with Christian worship, but not necessarily, and it has a kind of comical feel to it that would be appropriate. (I'd written "comical, olden-days feel" but didn't want to imply takbeer is old-timey in an Arabic context. But given the dad's rededication to religion, it reminds me of sheikhs who are constantly urging takbeer -- exulting and a little grandiose. Which is what hosanna carries for me.) So something like: For the first time ever, the bar rang with hosannas.
Can the author comment here? :) As far as I know, words like "Hosanna" have their cultural weight. As a reader I don't prefer reading it outside their cultural context. It's an appeal for help in Judaism, and a cry of praise in Christianity. I think the word has a long tail of historical cultural weight that definitely has nothing to do with takbeerat with all their Islamic-Arabic meaning and sub-meaning. Even Allah can't be translated simply to God. I apologize for my machine-translated English, and to repeat, that's my opinion as a mere reader. You are the professionals. :)
Now I love this process even more! I hear you on the hosanna baggage, and good to know that for you, it doesn't gibe at all with takbeerat.
And interesting about Allah, because I always skew toward using God, because 1) I want people to know that Allah is literally the Arabic word for God-with-a-capital-G, and 2) I don't want to give readers a chance to exoticize. But maybe that's too pedantic and controlling, and it is losing some of the resonance of Allah. (Our fault in English for squashing most of the meaning out of God!)
For the everyday use, Arabic too squashing most of the meaning out of God :) But if context is religion related, Allah is definitely not God. For example, the God who defeated by Jacob (Genesis 32:22–32) can't be Allah for the Muslims. That's just a note about the baggage that come with many words across cultures, not a theology debate.
In the end, the translator has the freedom/responsibility to choose what best for the text and the reader.
Thank you so much for your thoughtful engagement with the project, Zora! I'm so happy to have you as a reader, with such a wealth of experience, and linguistic and cultural knowledge!
I do see how in the very particular context of this scene that there is a certain equivalence of these takbirat and hosannas -- as you put it, "exulting and a little grandiose." But I agree with Mohammed, that both of these words have very different cultural weights, dimensions and histories, and I wouldn't want to substitute one for the other.
And Mohammed, I'm very interested to read your opinion against equating "Allah" and "God." I have tended to prefer translating Allah to God for the reasons that Zora gives, but I also agree with you that these words can refer to substantially different figures with their respective historical and cultural weight. Let's definitely discuss more. And I hope other readers will weigh in on this as well.
Knowing only English, I am astounded by the thought process in translating the author’s meaning of a simple phrase. I feel you have captured it .Good work Phoebe!
Yes, these phrases are always so tricky! I love your explanation of the challenges inherent in translating them and your thoughtful approach to this particular case. I also really enjoy seeing the various solutions you came up with. Your reasoning for your final choice is persuasive. I like the idea of alluding to "Allahu Akbar" rather than making it explicit. As you said, that phrase in English is too closely associated with the extremist battle cry, perhaps to the point of being reduced to that meaning alone for many readers. Changing "shouts" to "cries" is an artful move. It simultaneously compensates for omitting the specific "Allahu Akbar" 'cry' while adding a layer of meaning - cries of emotion - the visceral response to what the bargoers are witnessing on TV that leads to their utterances. I like it!
Another thought on this came to me while I was “sleeping”. How about using ‘Almighty God’ somehow? “Cries to God Almighty…”. Or “Cries invoking the Almighty…”? Just a thought…
This is a really great process! Thanks for sharing like this. I wonder if takbeerat could be translated as hosannas? Usually associated with Christian worship, but not necessarily, and it has a kind of comical feel to it that would be appropriate. (I'd written "comical, olden-days feel" but didn't want to imply takbeer is old-timey in an Arabic context. But given the dad's rededication to religion, it reminds me of sheikhs who are constantly urging takbeer -- exulting and a little grandiose. Which is what hosanna carries for me.) So something like: For the first time ever, the bar rang with hosannas.
Can the author comment here? :) As far as I know, words like "Hosanna" have their cultural weight. As a reader I don't prefer reading it outside their cultural context. It's an appeal for help in Judaism, and a cry of praise in Christianity. I think the word has a long tail of historical cultural weight that definitely has nothing to do with takbeerat with all their Islamic-Arabic meaning and sub-meaning. Even Allah can't be translated simply to God. I apologize for my machine-translated English, and to repeat, that's my opinion as a mere reader. You are the professionals. :)
Now I love this process even more! I hear you on the hosanna baggage, and good to know that for you, it doesn't gibe at all with takbeerat.
And interesting about Allah, because I always skew toward using God, because 1) I want people to know that Allah is literally the Arabic word for God-with-a-capital-G, and 2) I don't want to give readers a chance to exoticize. But maybe that's too pedantic and controlling, and it is losing some of the resonance of Allah. (Our fault in English for squashing most of the meaning out of God!)
For the everyday use, Arabic too squashing most of the meaning out of God :) But if context is religion related, Allah is definitely not God. For example, the God who defeated by Jacob (Genesis 32:22–32) can't be Allah for the Muslims. That's just a note about the baggage that come with many words across cultures, not a theology debate.
In the end, the translator has the freedom/responsibility to choose what best for the text and the reader.
Thank you Zora.
Thank you so much for your thoughtful engagement with the project, Zora! I'm so happy to have you as a reader, with such a wealth of experience, and linguistic and cultural knowledge!
I do see how in the very particular context of this scene that there is a certain equivalence of these takbirat and hosannas -- as you put it, "exulting and a little grandiose." But I agree with Mohammed, that both of these words have very different cultural weights, dimensions and histories, and I wouldn't want to substitute one for the other.
And Mohammed, I'm very interested to read your opinion against equating "Allah" and "God." I have tended to prefer translating Allah to God for the reasons that Zora gives, but I also agree with you that these words can refer to substantially different figures with their respective historical and cultural weight. Let's definitely discuss more. And I hope other readers will weigh in on this as well.